INSTEAD of spending my money to bail out the fat cats who got what they deserved, Congress should be drafting a bill banning sports movies.
Immediate action is needed to spare the American people from ever again being subjected to something as annoying as “Forever Strong.”
It revolves around Rick (Sean Faris, too old for the part), a cocky teenage hunk and rugby star. He lands in a juvenile detention center after his drunken driving almost kills a woman in his car.
I’m not sure if this is legal, but the warden offers to spring Rick if he will play rugby for the team that used to be his big rival. Need I go on?
As directed by Ryan Little and written by David Pliler, “Forever Strong” dredges up every sports movie cliché and stereotype ever invented. (Cue the slow-mo in the rain.)
It might even have coined a few new clichés as it wallows in shameless sentimentality.
If the script serves any purpose at all, it is to allow jocks to show off their buff bodies. They’re hot, but not worth 12 bucks at the box office.
Running time: 112 minutes. Rated PG-13 (mature themes). At Loews Village, Third Avenue and 11th Street.