Holly Hill’s heart pounded as she realized that what she was writing would change her life — and upend convention — with one push of the “Send” key.
She re-read the ad: “Sugar Daddy sought by attractive, educated, well-spoken, 35-year-old professional woman. I am single and don’t have any children. I am a fabulous cook and can provide gourmet meals should you require them. I am a qualified psychologist so I make an excellent listener and have a great love for intellectual conversation. I LOVE sex and there’s not much I don’t enjoy. I also give a great massage!”
Then, the kicker: “I will require a generous weekly allowance in return for all of the above.”
She was shocked at the feeling that came with posting it: “Who’d have thought such a thing could possibly feel empowering? But I was the employer. I was the one doing the hiring. That made me the boss. I was selecting them, and I could also sack them.”
Hill, who lives in Sydney, Australia, posted the ad in 2006 for a sugar daddy to supply her with $1,000 a week in exchange for sex, food and conversation. Hill, now 43, writes of her resulting exploits in “Sugarbabe,” a memoir to be released this summer.
It all began when she dated an older married man named “John,” who convinced her to give up her job as a clinical psychologist and enter the “Mistress Plan,” where she would be at his beck-and-call in exchange for him covering her rent and shopping.
But it all came crashing down, when he called the arrangement off after his wife learned of Hill and threatened to kill herself. He coolly e-mailed her to call it off and deposited $4,000 in her bank account.
Hill took the incident in stride. What’s the difference between being on the Mistress Plan and charging money for sex and companionship? In fact, she decided, isn’t it far more honest to put it all out on the table instead of dancing around the truth and allowing wealthy men to pay your rent, your restaurant tabs or your clothing sprees, but never considering yourself a prostitute?
Furthermore, she might actually help wives rather than hurt them, she decided. “I could do it as a service. I could help the men to help their wives. I might actually save marriages, not destroy them,” she wrote.
So she Googled “Sugar Daddy Wanted” and found Persona, a Web site devoted to such personal ads. Over the next several days, she would get 11,000 hits and hundreds of solicitations.
“It all seemed so civilized,” she noted, combing through hundreds of business-like e-mails.
There were three types of sugar daddies: the younger guys who were too busy to woo girlfriends; the middle-aged men whose wives were too busy for sex; and older fellows whose significant others looked the other way.
She whittled her picks down with her $1,000 a week price tag and made arrangements to interview a handful of applicants over coffees.
Her first daddy was a middle-aged American businessman named Richard. He confessed after several meetings that he hadn’t had sex with his wife in a decade.
“I can barely remember the last time we slept together,” he said. “All she’s interested in these days is looking after the kids.”
She pampered him with fine wines, cheeses, patés and desserts. They had mind-blowing sex. He enthusiastically paid for her weekly wage. She didn’t feel guilty, but he eventually did and called off their meetings.
Two others followed: a French-Algerian family man who was possessive and dangerously sexy, and a childish Chinese businessman with a passion for sweets and sex. She hosted the sugar daddies at her apartment and bought fancy clothes and sexy lingerie with the cash they gave her, but mostly spoiled them with decadent dishes and expensive liquors.
Her last daddy was Philip. On their first “date,” she invited him back to her place. After they had sex, she asked him where he put the condom. He admitted that he didn’t use one. She was livid. “I got his envelope, ripped it open and threw the money all over him. ‘Get out of my house, you moron!’” she screamed. “‘Go home to your wife.’”
Hill, who has since given up sugar daddies, says the experiences left her with a lot to think about — namely that almost all men will cheat.
She also learned that “first and foremost, there’s no difference between a sugarbabe, a prostitute, or a wife who is staying in an unhappy marriage because of the money.”
All three people are receiving money for sex or companionship, but the first two are more honest, she said.