I have been assigned a mentor in my firm with whom I’m not comfortable. He is a senior executive, but I don’t like his style or point of view. He’s very gossipy and seems political. Can I ask to be reassigned without burning a bridge?
Generally speaking, mentor programs are viewed positively, because they are beneficial to the workplace and career development. However, in order for a mentor relationship to be effective, there needs to be trust, rapport and respect between the mentor and mentee.
If the program doesn’t allow you to change mentors without fear of damaging a relationship — and unless we’re talking about a long-term commitment or the relationship is so bad that it’s truly a distraction you cannot endure — I’d suck it up and learn as much as you can.
Also, learning how this person thinks and how others view him could be beneficial as you navigate your career there. I’d also confide in your HR rep so your concerns and experiences are made known. If the duration is a lengthy one — more than a few months or more than you can endure — then ask how you can change mentors.
I am close friends with someone who reports to me. I just discovered they shared a confidential matter with someone else that I told them in confidence. How does one handle a sensitive employee relations matter with a personal friend who is also a subordinate?
So I’m thinking two things: First, do you need to look in the mirror and ask yourself why you shared something confidential with your friend? Was it work-related, and did they need to know — or were you being indiscreet yourself by sharing the information? I’m not accusing, just asking!
The second thing I am thinking is “The Godfather” — from which many work lessons can be learned (without the violence, intimidation and illegal behavior, of course!): “It’s not personal, Sonny, it’s strictly business.” When you are a manager, everyone on your staff — even your friends — must know that business comes first. If you can’t live by that, then you can’t be friends with anyone at work.